- Don t fall for sudden changes in behavior or promises of marriage, trips, gifts, etc. Introduction Very few relationships start on terms other than sweetness and politeness. Determine what help they might be - a place to stay, protection, financial help, etc. - Gradually become more boring, talk less, share less feelings and opinions. They may begin to tell you what to wear, what to listen to in music, and how to behave in public. Bad Stories People often let you know about their personality by the stories they tell about themselves. The Loser has permanent personality characteristics that create this damage. If you listen to those phone calls, as though taping them, you ll find The Loser spends most of the call trying to make you feel guilty. We all know to avoid people that appear insane or abusive and not select them as a dating partner. React to each in the same manner - a boring thanks. If you overreact or give in, you ve lost control again. Getting away from physical abusers often requires the assistance of family, law enforcement agencies, or local abuse agencies. During the Follow-up Protection period, some guidelines are: - Never change your original position.
Don t talk about possible changes in your position in the future. It s also obvious these warning signs are not only found in dating relationships - but in our spouse, our parents, our friends, and our relatives. From a psychological standpoint, The Loser has lived and behaved in this manner most of their life, clearly all of their adult life. That little device is handy to use on the phone - the microwave dinner just came out or someone is at the door. The goal is almost to bore The Loser to lessen the emotional attachment, at the same time not creating a situation which would make you a target am dating loser. Your new date may be subjected to phone harassment, vandalism, threats, and even physical assaults. Male losers often begin with behaviors that move you physically or hit the wall. However, if on the tenth time the slot machine pays us even a little, we keep pulling the handle - thinking the jackpot is on the way. In the beginning of the relationship, you will be exposed to witnessed violence - fights with others, threats toward others, angry outbursts at others, etc. Rest assured that your behavior will return to normal if you detach from The Loser before permanent psychological damage is done. If you go back to them, you actually fear a worse reaction if you threaten to leave again (making you a prisoner) and they later frequently recall the incident to you as further evidence of what a bad person you are. Ending the Relationship Remembering that The Loser doesn t accept responsibility, responds with anger to criticism, and is prone to panic detachment reactions - ending the relationship continues the same theme as the detachment. Watch for the methods listed above and see how The Loser works.
They give you the impression that you had it (anger, yelling, assault) coming and deserved the anger, violence, pouting, or physical display of aggression. When The Loser hears such possibilities, they think you are weakening and will increase their pressure. - The Loser will focus on making you feel guilty.. By this time you have already seen how The Loser is normally and naturally. In some cases, if they can t get rid of your best same-sex friend, The Loser will claim he or she made a pass at them. This is the honeymoon phase - where they catch you and convince you that they are the best thing that ever happened to you. Don t agree to the many negotiations that will be offered - dating less frequently, dating only once a week, taking a break for only a week, going to counseling together, etc. - Begin dropping hints that you are depressed, burned out, or confused about life in general. - Seek professional counseling for yourself or the support of others during this time. In one sense, they have always lived with this personality and behavior, often something they probably learned from their relatives/family. It s clear the article is a way of identifying not only losers but controlling, abusive, and manipulating individuals. You may be so overwhelmed by this display of instant attraction, instant commitment, and instant planning for the future that you ll miss the major point - it doesn t make sense. The Loser only is concerned with how they feel - your feelings are irrelevant.